My Immortal by Tara Gilesbie

Oh my god. Its available on Amazon.com.
Tara Gilesbie's infamous Harry Potter fan fiction, My Immortall, Is available for purchase at Amazon.com.

I can't believe it. I mean...Just...How?

Seriously, how on earth did THAT get published?

For those of you who can be bothered reading this and don't know who Tara Gilesbie or what My Immortal is, I shall explain.

My Immortal was posted to Fan fiction.net in 2006, by Tara Gilebsie, under the user nameXXXbloodyrists666XXX. It is a Harry Potter fan fiction that centres around "Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way" (Although, the author often spells "Ebony" as "Enoby, Eboby, Evony" Etc, etc)
Ebony is a "Goffik Satanist" Slytherin in her seventh year a Hogwarts. She is part vampire, Part witch. She is cursed with being too beautiful.
The characters are all divided between "Goffs", Posers and Preps.
Majority of the males are in love with "Enoby", but she only carries those feelings for Draco, and Once or twice, "Vampire" Potter (Or, as he was once known "Harry" Potter)

The character are so out of character it is shocking. Ebony is a very obvious Self-insert Mary-Sue. The worst Mary-Sue I have ever come across. Occasionally, towards the end, She accidentally begins to refer to "Ebony" as "Tara".

It is unknown weather Tara is a troll, or actually serious.

It is fairly hard to understand, but has some Brilliant lines in it. Tara's Authors notes are often incredibly amusing, also.

QUOTES:

"AN: STOP flaming! if u flam it menz ur a prep or a posr! Da only reson Dumbledeor swor is coz he had a hedache ok an on tup of dat he wuz mad at dem 4 having sexx! PS im nut updating umtil I get five good revoiws!"

"Voldemort gave me a gun"

"“I MAY BE A HOGWARTS STUDENT….” Hargirid paused angrily. “BUT I AM ALSO A SATANIST!”"

"“No.” he said meanly. “I don’t give a darn what Voldemort does to Draco. Not after how much he misbehaved in school especially with YOU Ebony.” he said while he frowned looking at me. “Besides I never liked him that much anyway.” then he walked away. Vampire started crying. “My Draco!” he moaned. (AN: don’t u fik gay guyz r lik so hot!)"

"WARNING: SUM OF DIS CHAPTA IS XTREMLY SCRAY. VIOWER EXCRETION ADVISD."

"“Snaketail what art thou doing?” called Voldemort. Then…… he started coming! We could hear his high heels clacking to us"

"“Its so unfair!” I yielded. “Why can’t I just be ugly or plain like all da other girls and preps here except for B’loody Mary, because she’s not ugly or anything.”"

"Why couldn’t Satan have made me less beautiful?” I shouted angrily. (an” don’t wory enoby isn’t a snob or anyfing but a lot of ppl hav told her shes pretty) “Im good at too many things! WHY CAN’T I JUST BE NORMAL? IT’S A FUCKING CURSE!”"

"“Oh yeah o have a confession after she got expuld I murdered her and den loopin did it with her cause he’s a necphilak.”

“Kawai.” I commnted happily"

"“EbonyIloveyouwiluhavesexwithme.” he said."

Seriously, you should read it